Well it is Friday morning, at 6:45am. I am sitting in my office, this office, for the last time.
I’m not leaving the program. It is being relocated three blocks down the street from where we are now. Yesterday I packed up most of my ‘stuff’ for when the movers come by on Saturday. Still, I wanted to come in early today (we usually start around 9’).
Why so early? I don’t know, a lot of reasons I guess.
The first one being to spend some time with our house cat, “Parker” (or Pahhka, she is from Boston, lol). She is actually a neighborhood cat that spends more time with us than she does with her own family. Sometimes she even has slumber parties with those that live in our dorm. Great cat, about 18 pounds and a hunter that quite often brings us her ‘kills.’ Loving & Fierce. I like that.
Another reason is I am going to miss this office. Thirty foot by eight foot with two large windows that open. This time of the year I can glance out every so often to admire the beautiful foliage that lies outside these windows and take a big deep breath and smile.
My new office down the street is twelve by twelve with two small windows that you cannot open set about six feet off the ground. I don’t like change; most people don’t; even times when it can be for something healthier than the present situation they may find themselves in.
I am not looking forward at all to this change. I can take this change as another reason to push ahead with even greater effort on my own plans; teaching, lecturing, getting out on the national scene as a presenter on, “Substance Abuse & Co-Occurring Disorders – A Clinical & Personal Perspective.” I have several other offerings as well. I want to get to a point where I can live part of the year up in Nova Scotia.
Stress can beneficial if it motivates one for ‘change.’
Time to finish packing, get ready for groups, and, oh yea, find “Pahhka!”
Friday, October 26, 2012
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Thoughts from the past several weeks...
Here I am half-way through the fall semester and knock-on-wood, everything is going relatively smooth. The students are energetic, engaging, and the time is ‘flying’ by.
Personally, the career is moving forward. I have been ‘talking’ for some time now about getting a web site up and running. Seemingly ‘good’ excuses have been greatly delaying this enterprise. Time is now; even if it is a rudimentary one just to get it going. My private practice has been growing and expanding, and there is the possibility of a regular radio show not too far off in the near future. Life is good.
Both my sons moved out at the beginning of the fall (yea! the water bill dropped by more than 50%!, lol). I have heard from friends that have gone through this phase of life that this can be a relationship ‘buster’ for many couples. The kids are gone, now where do we direct our energies? Many couples had not maintained an intimate relationship during those years; everything was for the ‘kids.’
I am very fortunate. Some evenings when Yvette and I are alone at home we just look at each other and start laughing. We don’t know why, we just do it. Don’t get me wrong, we love our boys. It is just that it has been so long since we only had to answer to each other. They are still in our lives, live close by, and drop in for dinner a few times a week. Sunday is game day with the boys and their friends (our ‘other’ kids) dropping in to watch the game – Good Time. Yvette loves cooking for the ‘crew’ and we all hang-out together. Nice, Really Nice.
Last week I went down to Connecticut to see my sister whose health is failing. I always feel strange returning to my old home town. I never returned to live there once I started college in Massachusetts (was there for 18 years – have been in Boston for the past 38 years).
It is either Stephanie Brown or Claudia Black; both excellent writers on the alcoholic/chaotic home that wrote, ‘you grow up, swear you will never become like them, you become just like them, then run away from home and become an orphan.’
Most of the patients I work with have siblings. If they grew up in a home with addiction/mental health issues I will often times hear that their siblings have scattered to the four winds; where is your sister these days – she’s in Alaska, where is your brother- oh, he’s in Texas.
People have said to me, “I know I have issues but staying around family just intensifies them. I’m crazy, but they are even crazier!” Call it a survival tactic if you will. How can a person deal with their ‘stuff’ if they are constantly surrounded by other family members and their ‘stuff? They can’t (at least not effectively in the beginning of treatment that is). This ‘survival’ mode can cause problems when dealing with the world outside of ‘family of origin.’ I will discuss this in more detail in a future blog.
So what else is going on? Well, I am wicked missing Nova Scotia. Vacation there this past summer has fueled my desire to be there more; the sense of community, the pace of life (there isn’t one, lol), the beauty to be found everywhere around one.
Maybe I’ll start a private treatment facility up there some day. If (when) I get more dates to expand my speaking engagements nationally and this becomes my primary source of income. Then one can live anywhere they like so long they have access to an airport that is relatively close by.
Well, time to go outside and admire the beautiful foliage.
a la prochaine…
Willy
Personally, the career is moving forward. I have been ‘talking’ for some time now about getting a web site up and running. Seemingly ‘good’ excuses have been greatly delaying this enterprise. Time is now; even if it is a rudimentary one just to get it going. My private practice has been growing and expanding, and there is the possibility of a regular radio show not too far off in the near future. Life is good.
Both my sons moved out at the beginning of the fall (yea! the water bill dropped by more than 50%!, lol). I have heard from friends that have gone through this phase of life that this can be a relationship ‘buster’ for many couples. The kids are gone, now where do we direct our energies? Many couples had not maintained an intimate relationship during those years; everything was for the ‘kids.’
I am very fortunate. Some evenings when Yvette and I are alone at home we just look at each other and start laughing. We don’t know why, we just do it. Don’t get me wrong, we love our boys. It is just that it has been so long since we only had to answer to each other. They are still in our lives, live close by, and drop in for dinner a few times a week. Sunday is game day with the boys and their friends (our ‘other’ kids) dropping in to watch the game – Good Time. Yvette loves cooking for the ‘crew’ and we all hang-out together. Nice, Really Nice.
Last week I went down to Connecticut to see my sister whose health is failing. I always feel strange returning to my old home town. I never returned to live there once I started college in Massachusetts (was there for 18 years – have been in Boston for the past 38 years).
It is either Stephanie Brown or Claudia Black; both excellent writers on the alcoholic/chaotic home that wrote, ‘you grow up, swear you will never become like them, you become just like them, then run away from home and become an orphan.’
Most of the patients I work with have siblings. If they grew up in a home with addiction/mental health issues I will often times hear that their siblings have scattered to the four winds; where is your sister these days – she’s in Alaska, where is your brother- oh, he’s in Texas.
People have said to me, “I know I have issues but staying around family just intensifies them. I’m crazy, but they are even crazier!” Call it a survival tactic if you will. How can a person deal with their ‘stuff’ if they are constantly surrounded by other family members and their ‘stuff? They can’t (at least not effectively in the beginning of treatment that is). This ‘survival’ mode can cause problems when dealing with the world outside of ‘family of origin.’ I will discuss this in more detail in a future blog.
So what else is going on? Well, I am wicked missing Nova Scotia. Vacation there this past summer has fueled my desire to be there more; the sense of community, the pace of life (there isn’t one, lol), the beauty to be found everywhere around one.
Maybe I’ll start a private treatment facility up there some day. If (when) I get more dates to expand my speaking engagements nationally and this becomes my primary source of income. Then one can live anywhere they like so long they have access to an airport that is relatively close by.
Well, time to go outside and admire the beautiful foliage.
a la prochaine…
Willy
Monday, October 1, 2012
Week 3 of Classes
Well the semester is rolling along now. After three weeks the students are settled in, I have deciphered their handwritten emails and phone numbers (lol), explained my expectations of them, and what their expectations should be of me.
The main course I teach is “Substance Abuse & Co-Occurring Disorders.” For a class of 55 (initially it was supposed to be 30-35) they are attentive and hopefully learning there is more to addiction than, ‘just don’t drink, get a sponsor, and go to meetings’ for those with co-occurring disorders.
I am NOT knocking 12 Step programs by any stretch of the imagination. Many dual-diagnosed people (myself included) initially found their sobriety in the traditional 12 Step programs and continue to utilize these as their base of recovery.
However, usually they are not enough in and of themselves. Dual Recovery Anonymous and Depression Bipolar Support Alliance meetings, one to one therapy, exercise, nutrition, and medication on a CASE by CASE basis if warranted. These can help to bridge the gap found more often than not between addiction and other mental health issues.
This fall I am teaching four courses, working days full-time in a Partial Hospitalization Program, expanding my private practice, working on getting my website up, finishing a book, etc., etc., etc.
Due to my hectic schedule it is more important than ever to stay vigilant regarding exercise and nutrition. I try to hit the gym every two days (preferable is every other day). When this is not possible I will at do at least a hundred push-ups (sets of twenty) and crunches during lunchtime in my office at work. Before classes I will take a nice twenty minute to half an hour walk around the campus. At UMASS-Boston this means down by Dorchester Bay; the smell of the ocean, IPod on with some classical music playing. I need to find those down moments even with a heavy schedule.
Hey, if I am not taking care of me, how can I realistically help others to help themselves? Otherwise, is that not the old “Do as I say, not as I do” philosophy?
Not really healthy, huh?
In the spring I am working towards presenting nationally on ‘Substance Abuse and Co-Occurring Disorders: 'A Clinical & Personal Perspective.' When I talk with addiction counselors from around the country I am amazed how many of them have never had any education on the co-occurring disorder piece. This to me is pretty scary.
Since my trip “Down East” to Nova Scotia this year with my wife I have been, and will continue to make time, for “Down Time.” Being with all her relatives and enjoying the way of life there I cannot wait to go back.
I am planning now for a couple of trips down there; one in the spring and then one in the summer. Also in the works may be a trip to Quebec City (Attention Sue, lol).
Today I am feeling fortunate and blessed; a family that loves and cares about each other, friends that can count on me as I can on them, and an ever expanding career.
Not too shabby, lol.
Peace, Out…for now.
The main course I teach is “Substance Abuse & Co-Occurring Disorders.” For a class of 55 (initially it was supposed to be 30-35) they are attentive and hopefully learning there is more to addiction than, ‘just don’t drink, get a sponsor, and go to meetings’ for those with co-occurring disorders.
I am NOT knocking 12 Step programs by any stretch of the imagination. Many dual-diagnosed people (myself included) initially found their sobriety in the traditional 12 Step programs and continue to utilize these as their base of recovery.
However, usually they are not enough in and of themselves. Dual Recovery Anonymous and Depression Bipolar Support Alliance meetings, one to one therapy, exercise, nutrition, and medication on a CASE by CASE basis if warranted. These can help to bridge the gap found more often than not between addiction and other mental health issues.
This fall I am teaching four courses, working days full-time in a Partial Hospitalization Program, expanding my private practice, working on getting my website up, finishing a book, etc., etc., etc.
Due to my hectic schedule it is more important than ever to stay vigilant regarding exercise and nutrition. I try to hit the gym every two days (preferable is every other day). When this is not possible I will at do at least a hundred push-ups (sets of twenty) and crunches during lunchtime in my office at work. Before classes I will take a nice twenty minute to half an hour walk around the campus. At UMASS-Boston this means down by Dorchester Bay; the smell of the ocean, IPod on with some classical music playing. I need to find those down moments even with a heavy schedule.
Hey, if I am not taking care of me, how can I realistically help others to help themselves? Otherwise, is that not the old “Do as I say, not as I do” philosophy?
Not really healthy, huh?
In the spring I am working towards presenting nationally on ‘Substance Abuse and Co-Occurring Disorders: 'A Clinical & Personal Perspective.' When I talk with addiction counselors from around the country I am amazed how many of them have never had any education on the co-occurring disorder piece. This to me is pretty scary.
Since my trip “Down East” to Nova Scotia this year with my wife I have been, and will continue to make time, for “Down Time.” Being with all her relatives and enjoying the way of life there I cannot wait to go back.
I am planning now for a couple of trips down there; one in the spring and then one in the summer. Also in the works may be a trip to Quebec City (Attention Sue, lol).
Today I am feeling fortunate and blessed; a family that loves and cares about each other, friends that can count on me as I can on them, and an ever expanding career.
Not too shabby, lol.
Peace, Out…for now.
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